So it’s just me tonight. Britt is on a lovely holiday with her school, so I’ve been able to spend the evening alone with my thoughts. Scary stuff, lemme tell ya.

It’s a gorgeous night tonight though. Our bedroom window faces north toward the city, and it’s so clear tonight that you can see the Canton Tower lit up in all its glory. To the west, lightning is dancing across the sky so far away that you can’t hear the thunder. You can, however, hear the beautiful instruments being played down by the lake…. accompanied by unfortunately horrible singing. But in all it’s horribleness, it’s beautiful. They’re just a bunch of people who get together and sing for no one. They’re just having fun singing together for no reason except that they feel like it. It’s pretty cool, and it’s something I’ll miss when we move. 

The reason that being left alone with my thoughts is so scary is…. I have no thoughts. No important thoughts anyway. I’m just sitting here. I checked facebook real quick, then stared out the window at the lightning. Total silence in my head. (All the little voices stood me up tonight 😉  Maybe it’s actually a good thing though. Since moving here, our lives have become filled with thoughts and questions and whatever else, that will not shut up! “When and where will we see another apartment?” “What is the theme for the Level 5 class this week?” “I haven’t prepared for class tomorrow… stink.” “Ew… that guy should REALLY put his arm down!!” “That’s an interesting flavor…”

My mind is like this: WORK, WORK, WORK… Apartment….? HOME…. Strange food, no way….. Groceries…. HOME…. WORK… Strange smells…. Pretty lights!

I’m constantly processing SOMETHING! All the time. I try to block it out with reading, listening to music, watching a movie, sleeping… but even then… there’s something going on in my head. But right now… now that I’m alone and I’m still, the thoughts have stopped. I allowed myself to have a moment of silence because it just felt so good to do nothing, and to think nothing. Then because the thoughts stopped, I thought it a good idea to write about my thoughtlessness which brought all the thoughts back. What a weird circle. Maybe I shouldn’t have written anything. 

I guess the point is… those thoughts are important… some of the time. They’re things I need to think about and take into consideration for my own well-being. But there should always be some times when I just stop thinking. How does the verse go? “Be still…” Tonight was a good night to be still for a bit. 

Sorry this one wasn’t filled with tales of flying Brittanys… just thought I’d share.

Goodnight all.

PEACE